i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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