I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
