Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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