I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
