Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
