My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
