a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
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