I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
