i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
