U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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