and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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