I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
