Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
im about as happy as oj after his trial
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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