i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
