She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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