You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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