He asked to "fluff my boner.."
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
