We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
