should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
