mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I am puke
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
and she was petting her beer can
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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