it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
