my room smells like sperm. sweet.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
