went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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