As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
