love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
