Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
