Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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