but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
People in love make me want to vomit
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
