ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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