The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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