North Korea, Best Korea!
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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