So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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