Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
