3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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