Bisexual people are plain selfish.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
