I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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