i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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