so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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