i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
