Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
