I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
