I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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