Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
