i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
