can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
