Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize