shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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