As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
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