I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
At least life still wants to fuck me.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
