My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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